Golf Quotations
Here are some funny quotations about golf. They're funny because they are so true. Enjoy.
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The Secret of golf is to turn three shots into two.
-Bobby Jones
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Like the classic plays and symphonies Sam Snead doesn't belong
to just one generation. His mark will be left on golf for an eternity.
-Peter Thomson
Dona' worry about the score so much, it's not the important
thing. -Shivas Irons
Now, here's Jack Lemmon, about to play an all-important eighth
shot. -Jim McKay
I'd rather play golf and break even, than work hard and come
out ahead. -Mike Donald
Real Golfers go to work to relax. -George Dillon
My best golf Score is 103, but I've only been playing for
15 years. -Alex Karras
We borrowed golf from Scotland as we borrowed whiskey.
Not because it's Scottish, but because it's good. -Horace G. Hutchinson
I still swing the way I used to, but when I look up the ball
is going in a different direction. -Lee Trevino
Never bet with anyone you meet on the first tee who has a
deep suntan, a one-iron, and squinty eyes. -Dave Marr
Golf combines two favorite American pastimes: Taking
long walks and hitting things with a stick. -P.J. O'Rourke
There is no such thing as a natural touch. Touch is
something you create by hitting millions of golf balls. -Lee Trevino
I know I am getting better at golf because I'm hitting fewer
spectators. -Gerald Ford
Putting isn't golf, greens should be treated almost the same
as water hazards: you land on them, then add two strokes to your score.
-Chi Chi Rodriguez
Indeed, The highest pleasure of golf may be that on the fairways
and far from all the pressures of commerce and rationality, we can feel
immortal for a few hours. -Colman McCarthy.
If the wind is in your face, you swing too hard just to get
the ball through it; if the wind is at your back, you swing too hard just
to see how far you can get the ball to go. -Mulligan's Laws
No Matter How short the par three, the drive is never a gimme.
-Mulligan's Laws
Keep your eye on the club. Nothing is more embarrassing
than to throw a club and then have to ask a playing partner where it went.
-Glen Waggoner
Nothing dissects a man in public quite like golf. -Brent
Musberger
It took me seventeen years to get three thousand hits in
baseball. I did it in one afternoon on the golf course. -Hank Aaron.
Golf is the hardest game in the world to play, and the easiest
to cheat at. -Dave Hill
Golf is not a wrestle with Bogey; it is not a struggle with
your mortal foe, it is a physiological, psychological, and moral fight
with your self; it is a test of mastery over self; and the ultimate and
irreducible element of the game is to determine which of the players is
the more worthy combatant. -Arnold Haultain
There we go! Miles and miles and miles! - Astronaut Alan
Shepard
It looks like a slice to me, Al. -Astronaut Ed Mitchel
Over the years, I've studied the habits of golfers.
I know what to look for. Watch their eyes. Fear shows up when
there is an enlargement of the pupils. Big pupils lead to big scores.
-Sam Snead
Golf is a game in which you yell 'fore', shoot six, and write
down five. -Paul Harvey
Golf is a good walk spoiled. -Mark Twain
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