Here are some funny quotations about golf. They're funny because they are so true. Enjoy.
Dona' worry about the score so much, it's not the important
thing. -Shivas Irons
Now, here's Jack Lemmon, about to play an all-important eighth
shot. -Jim McKay
I'd rather play golf and break even, than work hard and come
out ahead. -Mike Donald
Real Golfers go to work to relax. -George Dillon
My best golf Score is 103, but I've only been playing for
15 years. -Alex Karras
We borrowed golf from Scotland as we borrowed whiskey.
Not because it's Scottish, but because it's good. -Horace G. Hutchinson
I still swing the way I used to, but when I look up the ball
is going in a different direction. -Lee Trevino
Never bet with anyone you meet on the first tee who has a
deep suntan, a one-iron, and squinty eyes. -Dave Marr
Golf combines two favorite American pastimes: Taking
long walks and hitting things with a stick. -P.J. O'Rourke
There is no such thing as a natural touch. Touch is
something you create by hitting millions of golf balls. -Lee Trevino
I know I am getting better at golf because I'm hitting fewer
spectators. -Gerald Ford
Putting isn't golf, greens should be treated almost the same
as water hazards: you land on them, then add two strokes to your score.
-Chi Chi Rodriguez
Indeed, The highest pleasure of golf may be that on the fairways
and far from all the pressures of commerce and rationality, we can feel
immortal for a few hours. -Colman McCarthy.
If the wind is in your face, you swing too hard just to get
the ball through it; if the wind is at your back, you swing too hard just
to see how far you can get the ball to go. -Mulligan's Laws
No Matter How short the par three, the drive is never a gimme.
Keep your eye on the club. Nothing is more embarrassing
than to throw a club and then have to ask a playing partner where it went.
Nothing dissects a man in public quite like golf. -Brent
It took me seventeen years to get three thousand hits in
baseball. I did it in one afternoon on the golf course. -Hank Aaron.
Golf is the hardest game in the world to play, and the easiest
to cheat at. -Dave Hill
Golf is not a wrestle with Bogey; it is not a struggle with
your mortal foe, it is a physiological, psychological, and moral fight
with your self; it is a test of mastery over self; and the ultimate and
irreducible element of the game is to determine which of the players is
the more worthy combatant. -Arnold Haultain
There we go! Miles and miles and miles! - Astronaut Alan
It looks like a slice to me, Al. -Astronaut Ed Mitchel
Over the years, I've studied the habits of golfers.
I know what to look for. Watch their eyes. Fear shows up when
there is an enlargement of the pupils. Big pupils lead to big scores.
Golf is a game in which you yell 'fore', shoot six, and write
down five. -Paul Harvey
Golf is a good walk spoiled. -Mark Twain
If you're looking for some great deals on golf equipment, then you should visit In the Bag, a golf store just for Internet shoppers like you.
The Secret of golf is to turn three shots into two.
Like the classic plays and symphonies Sam Snead doesn't belong
to just one generation. His mark will be left on golf for an eternity.
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